Getting engaged is fun. Getting married is fun too, but getting engaged feels like gaining access into an exclusive club. Now you can finally start trying on wedding dresses instead of just pinning your favorite “Wedding Inspo” on Pinterest. You can show off your ring in the obligatory “We’re engaged!!” post on social media, and tell everyone about how you were SO SURPRISED! (even if you weren’t, it’s okay, no one really knows the truth except for you.) You can finally start saying things like “my fiancé” instead of “my boyfriend”, and “our wedding” instead of “my wedding” – because now there’s actually a groom. Yay for grooms! Yay for getting engaged!
Of course, it can also be a little overwhelming. Just slightly. After Kyle proposed, and after I said “yes”, and after we immediately popped the champagne that was waiting for us…. something happened. Not anything bad, just… a lull. The excitement was less intense once we’d gotten back into the car to head home. We just got engaged!
What do we do now?
“We should call people!” I said eagerly. “Tell everyone!”
“Yes!” He agreed. “Let’s call your parents, and then we’ll call mine!”
So we called my parents, and then we called his. And then we called his sister, and his grandma, and our closest friends, and they all wanted to know about things like “when’s the wedding?” and “where do you think you’ll get married?” and “do you want a big wedding or a small wedding?”
I didn’t know. I mean, Kyle didn’t know either – and we both kept saying things like “uh… I don’t know, we haven’t talked about that yet!” Were we supposed to have answers to these questions? Already? I had no idea. We just got engaged! I was still buzzing from the champagne!
In case you, like me, are overwhelmed and wondering what you’re “supposed” to be doing right after you’ve said “yes!” – below is a list of the first 10 things you should do right after getting engaged. You may not have your colors picked out yet, but if you can manage these things over the first few weeks, you’ll be ahead of the game.
- Share the news and celebrate!
You’re engaged! Call your parents! Call your best friend! Grab your dog and your fiancé and take obnoxious ring selfies! This is the BEST part of getting engaged – enjoy it!
- Insure the ring ( and size if necessary)
Your fiancé may have already had your ring sized (if he was able to get your ring size beforehand), but if not – make sure to get it sized ASAP so that it doesn’t slide off your finger and get lost! You should also get that rock insured right away – after all, it was expensive!
- Set a date (even if it’s not THE date)
Get a general idea. Do you want to get married in October of 2020? Or how about a spring wedding in 2021? Maybe June? Get a roundabout idea of when you’d like to get married so that you can start looking at venues for availability.
- Set a budget
This part isn’t as much fun, but it’s important to crunch the numbers and figure out what the two of you can realistically afford. Once you’ve set your budget, stick to it!
- Start saving!
I hated saving for our wedding. It’s a necessary evil, but I used to get so frustrated putting money away for it when I would have rather spent that money on shoes. But it paid off in the end when we were able to have the wedding that we wanted.
- Get a wedding planner
Not a wedding planner person – just a planner, for your wedding. You can buy them here, or check out Etsy or even Barnes and Noble! This will help you keep everything organized and in one place.
- Start a wedding Pinterest board
Or do what I did and just make your “private” one public. You’re engaged now – it’s socially acceptable for your Wedding Pinterest board to be out in the world.
- Get an idea of guest count
This can be tough – but figure out realistically how many guests you could have. Talk to your parents and ask them for their guest lists (yes, they will have them. Yes, they will want to invite people you’ve only met once or twice, because it’s their friends.) Determine an estimate (even if that estimate is “somewhere between 100-130”). This will help you when you’re looking at venues.
- Determine a general location
Pick a state. Pick a city. You don’t have to have your venue picked out yet, but if the two of your have family in different states, make sure you narrow down whose family will have to travel. (Or you can just do what Kyle and I did and pick a spot that forces both families to travel, in efforts to make it fair.)
- Register for gifts
This can be fun, and it’s good to get it done early. Trust me, people will ask where you’re registered. Which is a nice thing – because it means they want to buy gifts!